Lunar New Year in Busan (part 2)

Spending the night at a hotel was a great idea. The original plan was the sleep at the house of my wife's aunt. Given that there would be eight adults and a very young child and very little space there would have been no way I would have slept more than two hours. I got much more than that and felt refreshed as we checked out.

We then headed to the aunts house again. Even though I had just eaten breakfast and we had insisted in a phone call that we wouldn't be eating we were met by a table full of food. I am not really a morning eater and still rarely eat breakfast but this time I made a big effort as once again food had been cooked specifically for me. I tucked into some samgyetang and some galbi (before 11am). This time there was no beer but they did try to get me to crack open a bottle of red wine which I politely declined.

After watching a bit of TV everyone got ready changed and we headed off. I didn't know the plan but found out we were headed towards the Haeundae area which has one of the best beaches in Korea. We didn't go on the actual beach but we walked around Dongbaek park and enjoyed the fine Winter weather which was warming up. It was good to get around Busan after the previous day spent inside. Once again, the baby was the star of the show.



We headed to the two cars we were in and I thought we would be saying goodbye but they suggested we head to a temple and we agreed. The temple name was Yong Kung Sa. I got into the car an agnostic but got out an atheist. I was led to believe it would be a fifteen minute trip but it was nearer to ninety minutes and I couldn't wait to get out, but it was no ones fault as traffic was just very bad where we were headed. I really didn't want to go around a temple but we did and I soon felt a lot better.



The setting was good, a temple on the coast but it was, perhaps predictably, a bit too crowded. I would recommend anyone with spare time in Busan to check it out. If you are a Buddhist or just have a liking for old buildings then it is worth seeing. I have read it is over one thousand years old. For me though I am all templed out after living in Asia for five years.



The sun was setting and we parted ways but not before we were given a lift back to Haeundae. there was a bar I wanted to go to and we made our way to the Wolfound pub which originated in Seoul but has now expanded to Busan. I was starving at this point and gagging for a beer. I chugged down some cider and ale and ate the best fish and chips I've had so far in Korea - not much competition but it was good. The prices for everything seemed to be higher than in Seoul which was disappointing.



I left Busan wanting more which is always a good thing. Wanting more time in Busan, more time off work because I feel done now there and more time with my new family. I hope I can meet up with them somewhere soon.

Lunar New Year in Busan (part 1)

Busan was really busy over Lunar New Year with traffic sprawling all over the city as people were travelling to meet their families. My wife and I arrived at her aunt's house at around 4pm and I was so tired from the (short) travelling that I felt like I'd been on a plane. Her aunt was waiting for us with a big smile, just like her sister always is (my wife's mother). We entered the house and were greeted by two of my wife's cousins and her uncle.

The first thing we did when we got there was say happy New Year and then my wife got ready to bow to her aunt and uncle. This is part of Korean culture and tradition where younger members of the family bow to their elders and is called Seh Beh. She actually got me to do this with her (a bit strange as it was only the second time I'd met them and I'm not Korean) but I went along with it because my wife wanted me to. It only took five seconds and was painless. to my surprise her uncle gave my wife 50,000won and then her aunt gave the same to me. I didn't feel like I deserved it but declining the gift may have been offensive.$0D A
And then we sat down to eat. My aunt and one of her bousins had prepared some food and then added much more over the next six hours. I was very grateful for the food on offer, some of which my aunt had made specifically for me. It didn't take me very long at the house to see just how generous this family is. I also felt very welcome and never felt awkward, which was a slight worry beforehand.

I had some beer with her male cousin as we continued to eat and watch TV. The aunt continued to get me to eat as much as I could fit in my mouth. To refuse the food on offer would have been very impolite I feel. Quickly the aunt found out that I like pears and peppers. I soon joked that if I ate any more I would turn into one. After eating and drinking I was very full indeed. All this was done whilst sitting down on the floor and my knee took a bit of a battering.

A few hours later the youngest cousin and her husband arrived (from Seoul) with their two year old baby daughter who is as adorable as any baby could probably ever be. Everyone watched the baby being a baby and we continued to watch TV and eat and drink and talk. The youngest cousin has a husband who speaks good English which I appreciated greatly. Not long after 10pm the oldest cousin, who I have seen the most arrived with her husband, also from Seoul. They sat down to eat and drink and relax. The oldest cousin's husband also speaks good English. We talked more and drank more without getting drunk. I felt very comfortable during all of this.

Later that night the baby performed the Seh Beh to all the family including my wife and I. It was probably the cutest thing I've ever seen and everyone opened up their wallets gladly to give the baby some money.

I learned some new Korean words over Lunar New Year. Perhaps I will get the chance to use them again. I didn't take any pictures of my first day because it didn't feel right. I'm new to the family and wanted to be as unobtrusive as possible. I would have liked to have taken a few snaps but I'll leave that till next time, whenever that is. Here is some of the vocabulary I learned.

Seh Beh - 세배 - bow performed to elders

Imoh - 이모 - aunt

Imoh Boo - 이모부 - aunt's husband

Sa Chon - 사촌 - cousin

Jo Kah - 조카 - niece/nephew

Yobo - 여보 - darling/honey (used between a husband and wife)

The hospitality extended to us was amazing. At no time did I feel unwelcome and I hope that one day we can reciprocate with at least some of them. I'm lucky to have such a great extended family. At around 11pm we headed to our hotel and of course one of the family drive us there. We were both tired and wanted to be fresh for the next day where we would meet the family again.

My wedding day in pictures

Our 'wedding lunch celebration' day turned out to be great. A special day for my wife and I to remember always. Here are some pictures taken of us, my new family and our friends.

After being introduced I was asked to say a few words

I had to write down my thoughts because I didn't want to make any mistakes

Here we are waiting for my wife's mother to say a few words

My mother in-law said very little but was very, very happy

The cake arrives and we have to blow out the candle

The cake was still defrosting so it was difficult to cut it, despite them giving us a sword

My wife and I amazed that the cake was so rock hard

My co-workers, Sang Hee, Sung Young and Nick

My wife and I enjoying the day immensely

Another co-worker shot of Sung Yong, Nick, Ivan and Jong Bae

Jong Bae, Diana and Sung Yong

Our friends, Hannah and Mark who are also set to get married

Big assembled family shot. Can you spot me?

My wife and I, with her mother and her brother

Another picture of my wife and I with her mother

Here is my mother in-laws sister and husband, and her children and their spouses

At this point my jaw was starting to ache a little but we continued - those are genuine happy smiles though!

More photos? OK, just one more

My wife really wanted to throw her bouquet and her friend caught it

Now we could sit down. Next to my co-worker, Jong Bae

Here I am with my partner teacher, Sung Yong

My mother in-law starting to relax a little

Baby loves oranges?

Baby doesn't love oranges

Two of my wife's cousins. The one on the left speaks a little English

Now my mother in-law really starting to enjoy the occasion

Cheers to a successful day!

Special thanks go out to my co-worker and friend, Ivan who took most of these pictures and of course to all those who helped make our day so memorable.

My wedding day in Korea

I've been a little slow in writing this up, not because I didn't want to but because I've been knackered with the lead up to it, the actual day and a genuine lack of sleep afterwards so I'll try to describe things as best as I can now.

Last Saturday I had a 'Wedding celebration lunch', which ended up being basically just a wedding but without any of the vows. To explain further, my wife and I married some seven months ago but didn't have an actual wedding. Things have been great since then but at times I think my wife felt a little incomplete, like we weren't properly married so we knew we had to sort something out. In the end we decided to have lunch with some family and friends to celebrate our marriage.

In the lead up to last weekend I started to get a little nervous, which was very irrational because we've been married for so long but in truth I am a little uncomfortable dealing with crowds of people I don't know or don't know very well. I was a bit anxious and didn't sleep much and spent too much time thinking what would happen. I needn't have worried because we had such a great day.

Preparation for this didn't take as long as many weddings do but there were things to sort out which we managed to do quite easily and my wife deserves credit for all the hard work she put in. The day started at the wedding shop (don't know the technical name). The make up and hair for my wife and her immediate family took over two hours. Myself, they did put some stuff on my hair and I got dressed up in a suit which was bought a few weeks prior and then we were off to the hotel where we were maving the lunch.

After looking at a few places which could hold the number of people we wanted we settled on the Burgundy room at the hotel Novotel in Daegu. This is very central in Daegu and very easy to get in and out of. The choice proved to be a good one for us. The room where we had lunch was very good, with a view of the city centre that overlooked a park rather than the less salubrious parts.

When we got there we had to prepare some things and then to wait for the people to arrive. I waited with my wife, my mother in-law and my wife's brother. My mother in-law were wearing traditional Korean clothes (a hanbok) whilst my wife rented a wedding dress for the occasion. We greeted everyone who came. Invites were restricted to coming from my wife, myself or from my mother in-law. We thought we had invited around fifty people, but it turned out that sixty seven came, so they room filled out quite well. If forty people had come I'd have been happy but nearly everyone invited came which helped make the day special for all of us.

Inviting people was a little difficult for me. Firstly none of my family could make the trip and we had already decided that we would have some kind of celebration when we made our way back to the UK to live. Also being here for over four years I have made many friends and acquaintances and in normal circumstances would have liked to have invited many more people than I did. Because of the transient nature of my job I have met many people who have subsequently left and it would be impossible for them to come.

Here I must mention that my wife and I have been to many weddings here in Korea. Some good, some bad, some terrible and almost nothing we'd seen together that we wanted incorporated into any celebration of ours. That meant no kids running around, trying to get people not to wear jeans and baseballs caps, no electric violins, no smoke or dry-ice machines, no confetti throwing bazookas and no cheesy wedding pictures. Of course, some things we talked about not doing we ended up doing (cheesy pictures of us) but that ended up being OK.

When everyone had arrived and sat down we made our way into the room. My wife's cousins husband (phew) introduced us with some words that I have been told were kind. I really appreciated him doing that. One of the unfortunate things about having a poor command of the Korean language means I am restricted in my communication with my wife's family. I wish I could have heard what he said.

After being introduced the spotlight really was on us. This is what I was having a bit of stress with. I don't like being the centre of attention but, that's kind of the idea when you have a wedding. I had decided to make a quick speech about how much I love my wife. I had to write it down. After I had finished I saw my wife holding back tears - was my speech that bad? Well I knew she was emotional and it turns out she loved what I said, even though it was very simple it came from the heart.

I asked my wife is she wanted to say something but she was unable to at the time due to the situation. My wife has subsequently told me that she was so emotional that if she had said something then she would have cried (happy tears!) so she tried to keep her composure. Then my mother in-law said some words. This day was really about my wife and her mother. It was great for them both to have a day where everyone was celebrating them. I know they both had a great time and they really deserved that.

We then had to cut the cake that we ordered the previous week. However it was rock hard. They even gave us what resembled a sword to help cut it but to no avail. Luckily it thawed out as the afternoon went on. After that the pressure was off and we went round the tables and thanked everyone for coming and encouraged them to eat. The feedback we got was that the food was good for the situation although I have to say I wasn't able to eat much because I was a little busy just enjoying the day.

I managed to talk with a lot of my friends and Ivan my co-worker took several photos that we will treasure. Bright sunshine filled the room throughout and I think things couldn't really have gone any better. At the end of the day we were tired both physically and emotionally, but with a sense of satisfaction that would be hard to replicate. The day exceeded our expectations and will remain in our memory for a long time hopefully. We now truly feel like a married couple.

Far away from home

Today is my brothers 40th birthday. Just one of the many occasions I have missed since coming to Korea some four years ago. I can just about remember when my brother was a teenager which now makes me feel a little old, though I know at thirty one that is not the case. Has time really flown by so quickly or have I just pretended to be oblivious of its inevitability? Time is easy to define but becoming harder for me to measure. Stuck in my self-inflicted bubble of comfort, at times I feel like I will be home soon and sometimes an age away. I would love nothing more than to wish my brother happy birthday in person but that will have to wait. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Many happy returns, dear brother.